Articles Posted in Divorce Settlement

finish lineFor anyone in the middle of a divorce case – which I imagine is most of the readers of this blog – reaching the finish line of your case may seem like an impossible dream.  I am here to tell you it happens every day and it will happen for you.  What is not often discussed is what happens once your Judgment of Dissolution is filed.

Notice of Withdrawal

Your attorney will prepare a document titled Notice of Withdrawal of Attorney of Record.  This is a form that puts the court, the other party, and the world at large on notice that you are no longer represented by an attorney.  These forms can only be filed when a case has concluded and gone to Judgment or final order.

Despite the name, your attorney is not abandoning you; in fact your attorney is trying to protect you by filing the form.  Family law is unique in that we have post Judgment motions and discovery.  These can be requests to modify support orders or to change child custody orders. If a motion of this type is filed post Judgment, if I am your attorney of record, then it is possible to serve that motion on me and my office.  If I have moved offices or retired by that point, you may never know a motion was filed and could end up in trouble or without support because you did not even know there was a hearing.

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pokerThe title of this blog – for our younger readers – comes from the Kenny Roger’s song, “The Gambler” which feels appropriate when discussing a family law case.  Parties gamble on the strength of their position, the strength of their legal theories and evidence, and the likelihood they can convince a judge to accept their story.  There is always the other side to that gamble; namely the other party.  They are also gambling.  Family law is not always a zero-sum game, but there are many issues that are either a “yes” or a “no.”  So when you litigate a case, you may spend a great deal of time and money only to come out on the other end empty handed.

Good gamblers know to always hedge their bet.  Hedging is the act of protecting yourself from loss by reducing the risk.  Hedging a bet comes at a cost though. You may reduce your risk of loss, but you also reduce your recovery.  In family law, you reduce risk by negotiating a settlement.  There are many ways parties can reach a settlement of their case, but the following three scenarios represent the most common avenues. Continue reading

 

wire-puzzle

In Family Law, tracing is the method by which a party proves that funds in a particular account are, or were, used to acquire separate property.  Family Code section 760 holds that all property acquired during a marriage, regardless of source, is community property, it can sometimes be a difficult and expensive endeavor to try to perform a tracing. In California Family Law, there are three ways to prove a tracing: 1) Direct Tracing; 2) Exhaustion 3) Total Marital Recapitulation.

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home-158089_960_720There are so many reasons a client wants to remain in the family home after the divorce proceedings have been filed.  Often it is a custodial parent who wants to provide normalcy for their children.  Other times it is for financial or emotional reasons, or a combination of the three.  Whatever the reason, unless one party agrees to move out of the residence,  a court order will be required to exclude a party from living in the family residence.

Deciding who will remain in the residence at the beginning of a case is a problem nearly every family law litigant will face; requiring the assistance of the court in reaching that decision is far less common.  In most cases, one or both parties will decide to leave the family residence.  In these situations it is important to have a written agreement about who is leaving, who is staying, and how the expenses related to the residence are going to be paid.   These agreements are where most of the controversy lies, especially with regard to the payment of the expenses.  That is an issue that should be addressed in a separate blog.

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mercedesFor years, Christina Estrada’s life read like a fairytale; former international supermodel fell in love with a billionaire Saudi Arabian sheikh, raising a daughter and sharing a mansion in the British countryside with an unlimited monthly budget to spend on whatever their hearts desired. She is quoted describing her married life as “magical.” Unfortunately, just as with most fairytales, the magic came to an end and reality set in when the sheikh obtained a divorce in 2014 in Saudi Arabia, under Islamic law, without Christina’s knowledge. And that was AFTER he had already married a 25-year-old Lebanese model, without Christina’s knowledge…and obviously while he was still married to her.

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One of the firsringing moneyt issues a new client will ask us about is support.  Whether it is child support, spousal support, or both, support is one of the most important issues in your family law case.  It’s easy to understand why.  During your marriage income and expenses are shared and over time you find a happy medium between the amount of money you have coming in and the amount of money you have going out to pay expenses.  After you separate, the income doesn’t change, but the expenses will often double.  That means two rent payments, two food bills, two utility payments…the list goes on.  If you and your spouse were just making ends meet before the separation, odds are it will be twice as difficult now that expenses have increased. Continue reading

Elvis

On June 13 Lisa Marie Presley filed for divorce from her fourth husband, Michael Lockwood. While Lisa Marie isn’t the only star we’ve written about to go through multiple divorces, her specific case highlights a common and sometimes very complicated issue in divorce which occurs when one spouse has taken control of the finances and the other has little to no involvement in financial matters (the so-called “out spouse” is the one who stayed out of financial matters during the marriage).   Continue reading

single-parent.jpgParenting is a challenge no matter how you look at it. Parenting alone, when your spouse is no longer in the picture, is arguably even harder. After a divorce, you will not be able to rely on your ex-spouse’s assistance (assuming you did while married) when your children are in your custody. You will need to develop certain skills to cope with being a single parent, especially if you are the primary custodial parent post-divorce. Learning and applying these skills will take some time but will only serve to benefit both you and your children.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help. After a divorce you might feel a liberating sense of independence. But try not to let this newfound independence hinder your ego and keep you from asking for help when you need it. You might think that you have already burdened your family and friends enough when they helped you get through the divorce, but that doesn’t mean that they are done with you. If they stuck by your side through the tumultuous divorce they will most likely continue to stick by your side and support you in your journey as a single parent. So don’t be afraid to ask for that third, fourth or fifth hand when you need it most.

It’s important to develop a support group. You probably already have a support group of close family and friends who helped keep you sane throughout the divorce process. But think about also joining a local group of single parents for some extra support. Other single parents can relate to what you’re going through in a way that your family or friends might not be able to do.

single-parent-alone.jpgDon’t forget to take time for yourself. If you are a single parent, chances are that you are burning the candle at both ends to meet your child’s every need and keep up with daily tasks. Although you’re being a great parent, you’re probably forgetting to take time to focus on yourself. Even if it’s just an hour of quiet reading or a yoga session, give your mind and body a break from parenting every once and a while.

Getting through that first year of single parenting is something to pat yourself on the back for. Hopefully, things will only get easier from here on out. Remember that you are stronger than you think you are.
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beaniebabies-divorce.jpgIf you grew up in 1990s, chances are you are familiar with the Beanie Babies fad. However, if you somehow missed out on that craze, Beanie Babies were the extremely popular stuffed animals made by Ty Warner, Inc. (later renamed as Ty Inc.). They were so popular and “valued” that in 1999 a divorcing couple actually went to count to divide up their Beanie Baby collection. No, I am not kidding! Apparently, the couple was unable to figure out how to divide up their Beanie Babies by themselves, without court intervention, so they literally took them all to court and divided them one by one in front of the judge.

While the family law court provides individuals with their “day in court” to allow a judge to make a decision about their case, most people will agree that it seems pretty ridiculous to go to court to have Beanie Babies divided. Even as a family law attorney, I am a big proponent of helping my client resolve as many of their issues outside of court as possible.

Going to court can be very costly for both parties. They are not only paying their attorney’s hourly fee, but there are other costs involved such as paying for a court reporter. Additionally, going to court means that if you are a working individual, you will have to take time off work to attend the hearings. Also, the divorce process will likely take much longer. The courts are extremely backed up and hearings are typically set months out. The longer your divorce goes on, the more anger, resentment and frustration seem to build up. Is it truly worth the time, attorney fees and emotional impact?

tug-of-war-divorce.jpgSo many issues can be dealt with outside of a court room. This includes division of your precious collection of Beanie Babies with your soon to be ex-spouse. If the value of your precious items is at issue, then bringing in a third party appraiser might be helpful. Also, when negotiating division of assets outside of court, it is important to carefully consider the item’s current and future value. It may be a huge risk to assume that items, like Beanie Babies, will have a significant future value. If you let your spouse keep a $20,000 vehicle at no charge or offset, in order to keep your beloved collection of Beanie Babies, you might be highly disappointed when years down the road you find out that Beanie Baby is still only worth less than $10. It’s a significant risk when you don’t know the item’s future value, but it’s a risk you might have to take to move the negotiating process forward and stay out of court while proceeding with your divorce.
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nesting-custody-agreement.jpgTrying to figure out a custody arrangement that will work best for both yourself and your children can be difficult and overwhelming. One type of custody arrangement that is not often mentioned or considered is what is known as a “nesting custody arrangement.” This type of custodial agreement (typically agreed upon between the parents rather than a court) means that the children will live full-time in the family home and the parents will share custody by taking turns living there with the children.

A divorce results in a lot of change for children. One of the big changes is that the children may feel like they have to uproot their lives, friends, and activities each time that the other parent exercises custody. A nesting arrangement might actually be best for your children because it will not require them to pack their bags every weekend (or whatever the custody schedule may require) to go to “mom’s house” or “dad’s house.” Instead, the children can remain where they are comfortable and around things that are known to them. This is particularly important for children with disabilities, who would find it even more difficult to constantly change residences. Rather, with a nesting custody arrangement, the children’s lives remain somewhat free of disruption, while the parents are the ones who are inconvenienced.

Although a nesting agreement may be the best for the children, it is possibly one of the harder arrangements for the parents. It requires a lot of cooperation and self-sacrifice on behalf of both parents. The parents must be on somewhat good terms with each other and be devoted to the concept of family, even though they are choosing to no longer live together. It also requires the parents to each have a second place to reside when it is not their “turn” to be in the family home.

nesting-custody-dad.JPGDepending on your specific circumstances, such as your financial situation, the level of tension between you and your spouse, the age of your children, whether your children have any disabilities, etc., a nesting custody arrangement might work best for you and your children. Perhaps it is an arrangement that you could consider trying out temporarily before setting anything in stone. Although it is an uncommon arrangement, it is one that should be explored more often if divorcing couples are truly looking out for the best interest of their children.

We understand that this is a sensitive situation that could greatly affect your family and your relationship with your children, and our team can provide you with the caring and outstanding legal counsel you need and deserve. If you would like to discuss your rights under California’s child custody laws, we encourage you to contact us as soon as possible.
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