Nancy J. Bickford

Divorce can have a devastating effect on both parties’ standard of living and finances.
We have previously blogged about the sacrifices divorcing spouses make when they cannot afford to support two separate households at the same standard of living they enjoyed during marriage.
However, in Del Mar, the “gray divorce trend” is resulting in another sacrifice divorcing couples make – retirement.

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From 1990 to 2010, the number of divorces involving spouses over 50 years old “gray divorcés” doubled. Experts say that one of the causes for the increase in later-in-life divorces is longer life spans. Just like a divorce between spouses in their 20’s and 30’s will affect the current standard of living for both parties, a divorce past 50 will affect retirement lifestyles. If a couple divorces when the spouses are between 20 and 40 years old, there is plenty of time before retirement for both spouses to re-build any divided retirement funds. However, gray divorcés will experience the following financial roadblocks:

First, the accumulated retirement savings between the parties is usually divided in half upon divorce. When parties divorce, all property acquired during marriage is divided equally. Most, if not all, of a couple’s retirement fund is usually acquired during marriage. Thus, each spouse will only end up with one-half of what they planned on retiring on with his or her spouse.

Second, funding two separate retirements can cost between 30% and 50% more than funding one. Post divorce, the parties will take separate vacations, take twice as many trips to visit their children and grandchildren, use two separate cars instead of one, live in two separate houses, etc. In addition, if one former spouse becomes ill, the other will not be there to care for him or her. Therefore, post divorce, a spouse may have to use significant retirement funds to pay for medical care.

Read some frequently asked questions about divorce in Del Mar

Financial planners have a few suggestions to help gray divorcés get through divorce and retirement past 50. They suggest hiring a financial adviser simultaneously with hiring a divorce lawyer. Additionally, they advise against supporting adult children when it is not feasible. Often around the age of 50, a gray divorcé will have a child who is getting married and expecting them to shell out $30,000 for a wedding. These types of purchases are not advisable. Finally, financial advisers suggest reducing spending by living in a smaller home, traveling less and eating out less.
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Brendan Fraser and Afton Smith married in 1998 and divorced nine years later in 2007. At the time of their divorce, Fraser was ordered to pay Smith approximately $900,000 per year for spousal support and child support for their three children. Now, Fraser claims that he can no longer make the required payments, which, if made on a monthly basis, total $75,000 per month. Fraser has filed a motion in family court seeking a post-judgment modification of child and spousal support.

In San Diego, after a divorce is finalized, family courts generally have the ability to change support orders if facts and circumstances have materially changed since the first orders were made. If the moving party can prove to the court a “material change of circumstances” he or she may be granted a post-judgment modification of support. One of the most common changes of circumstance relied upon by courts is a change in income for one or both parties. If the spouse ordered to pay support has experienced a significant decrease in earnings, the court may lower his or her support obligation.

However, it is important to note that San Diego family courts only have the ability to modify the support order back to the date a motion was filed. If one spouse gets fired and does not file a motion to modify support for a few months, he or she may owe a significant amount of back child and/or spousal support. Regardless of a spouse’s current income, his or her obligation to pay support will not change until a motion is filed with the court. Even in cases where a judge determines that a material change of circumstances exists and that support should be modified going forward, he or she is not required by law to make the order retroactive to the date the motion was filed.

For many Del Mar families, real estate is their most valuable asset. Because the prices of the average family home are so high, many families must invest significant funds into real estate just to live in the area.

However, upon divorce, all community property must be divided equally by the court.

If the parties have no other assets as valuable as the family home, it must be sold and the proceeds divided.

In July 2012, Us Weekly released photos of Twilight star, Kristen Stewart, and Snow White and the Huntsman director, Rupert Sanders’, cheating scandal. Stewart and Sanders were photographed kissing in a parked car on the side of a secluded road. At the time, Stewart was involved in a serious relationship with teen heartthrob Robert Pattinson, and Sanders was married to British model Liberty Ross. Although Stewart and Pattinson reconciled in September, Ross has recently filed for divorce from her husband of nine years.Ross and Sanders reportedly gave their marriage another shot after news of the cheating scandal broke and even attended marriage counseling. However, Ross was unable to move past her husband’s public infidelity. The former couple has two children, Skyla, age 7, and Tennyson, age 5. In her Petition for Dissolution of Marriage, Ross requested joint custody of the children in addition to spousal support and attorney fees. Sanders filed a Response to the Petition also requesting joint custody but not spousal support. Sanders wants each party to bear the cost of his or her own attorney fees.

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Ross retained celebrity divorce attorney, Laura Wasser, to represent her in her divorce. Wasser is most famous for her representation of celebrities such as Heidi Klum, Ryan Reynolds, Kim Kardashian, and Britney Spears. According to Los Angeles Times, Wasser’s services will cost Ross $750 per hour. With rates that high, it’s no surprise that she is asking the court to order Sanders to cover Wasser’s fees. As Del Mar divorce attorneys are well aware, California courts have the authority to order one spouse to contribute toward the attorney fees and costs incurred by the other spouse. However, since California is a “no-fault” state, Sanders’ infidelity will be irrelevant to all of the court’s rulings.

Valentine’s Day is a romantic time in Del Mar and throughout San Diego County. The romance of this holiday can sometimes stir up old feelings between divorcing spouses. It is not uncommon for spouses going through a Del Mar divorce to send each other gifts on Valentine’s Day or even to spend the day together. However, it is important to consider the legal ramifications of these acts especially with regard to the date of separation. On the other hand, newly separated spouses may be spending Valentine’s Day with a new significant other for the first time in a while. Before substantial gifts are given to a new love interest or money is spent on a lavish trip, it is important to also consider how these acts may impact your divorce proceeding in Del Mar.

The date of separation is an important consideration in many divorces. The marital estate is the property divided upon divorce. Property can only be accumulated in the martial estate between the date of marriage and the date of separation. Thus, once spouses decide to end their marriage, they stop accumulating any community assets. In order for a separation to occur, the spouses must physically separate (live apart) with the simultaneous intent never to resume the marital relationship. As Del Mar divorce attorneys understand, only one spouse is necessary to establish the requisite intent to end the marriage.

Read more about date of separation from Del Mar divorce lawyer Nancy Bickford

Peter Robbins, voice of the beloved Peanuts character Charlie Brown, was arrested on Sunday, January 20th, on charges of making criminal threats and stalking. Robbins was the voice of Charlie Brown in both “A Charlie Brown Christmas” and “It’s a Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown” television specials.

ABCNews.com reported that, while the details of the arrest warrant were not immediately available, the charges related to Robbins stalking his ex-girlfriend and making criminal threats against a plastic surgeon.

nbcsandiego.com reported that it all started with a breast enhancement performed on Robbins’ former girlfriend, Shawna Kern, by La Jolla plastic surgeon Lori Saltz. Apparently Robbins and Kern were a couple at the time the procedure was performed, but broke up sometime thereafter. After the couple split, Robbins allegedly demanded his money back from Saltz, stalking her and threatening her life if she did not refund the money.

There many paths to ending a marriage in San Diego – including settlement, trial, uncontested divorce and simplified divorce. Many couples struggle for months and even years to work out the complex issues involved in divorce such as property division, support, and custody and visitation. Dutch entrepreneur, Jim Halfens, created a new method of divorce used in the Netherlands called the “Divorce Hotel”. Using this method, a couple checks into the Divorce Hotel on a Friday, and with the help of family law attorneys and mediators, checks out on Sunday with divorce papers in hand. Instead of the typical hourly rate, the couple pays a flat fee for their stay in the Divorce Hotel.After experiencing great success in the Netherlands, Halfens is attempting to bring his novel concept to the United States, which is known for its extraordinary divorce rate. Halfens is not only negotiating with hotels and local family law attorneys, but also with television production companies. Halfens is attempting to start a new reality show which follows the couples through their stay at the Divorce Hotel. Many prominent divorce lawyers have expressed serious doubts about the practicality of Halfens’ concept. These attorneys are concerned that most divorces are too complex and/or acrimonious to be completed in a single weekend. U.S. divorce attorneys do agree that the concept may be successful in cases where the divorcing couple remains on friendly terms and has a relatively straightforward marital estate to divide.

Read more about uncontested divorce here

Many obstacles can prevent the Divorce Hotel method from succeeding. A divorce proceeding can be dragged out because spouses often hide money, undervalue assets, and perpetrate fraud. Discovering these inconsistencies and seeking out the truth regarding the marital estate takes time, money, and a lot of effort by experienced family law attorneys. This work can skyrocket the cost of a divorce by increasing costs, fees, and may even require hiring an expensive expert. In order to combat this reality, Halfens screens the couples that apply to stay at the Divorce Hotel. His team tries to weed out its applicants and only admit those who are willing to mediate and work together to reach a solution. Couples who bicker or barely speak to each other are rejected.

If you have as much money as Tiger Woods, maybe it can buy you love. After a massive cheating scandal broke in late 2009, Elin Nordegren filed for divorce from her successful golf star husband, Tiger Woods. In a record-breaking settlement, Nordegren walked away from her marriage with $750 million. In return for her cash pay-out, Nordegren agreed to never publicly speak out about Woods’ affairs with over twenty different women. Despite their incredibly public divorce, just over two years after the couple reached a global settlement, Woods’ again proposed marriage to Nordegren.Apparently Woods is not satisfied with his not-so-new found single lifestyle. His friends say he is incredibly unhappy without his family and has not managed to hold a steady girlfriend since Nordegren. Although Woods has dated several other models since his divorce, he hasn’t recovered from his split with Nordegren. On or around Christmas 2012, Woods got down on one knee, presented her with a ring, and “re-proposed” to his former wife. Nordegren is considering Woods’ proposal, but only on the condition that he agree to include a $350 million anti-cheating clause in their prenuptial agreement. Reportedly, Woods has no problem agreeing to Nordegren’s condition despite the fact that his accountants think he is crazy. Woods is ready to sign on the dotted line, set a wedding date, and return back to his former married life.

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California is a “no fault” state. This means that in a San Diego divorce proceeding infidelity is irrelevant when dividing assets and debts, setting spousal and/or child support, and determining custody and visitation rights of the parties. Despite this default rule, parties have the ability to agree to abide by different rules. As in the Woods-Nordegren reconciliation, parties can agree to put an “anti-cheating” provision in a premarital agreement. Under such a provision, a spouse would be punished if he or she was unfaithful during marriage. If no such provision existed, neither party could be punished by the courts for infidelity. There are strict rules that a divorce attorney must follow when drafting any agreement, especially a premarital agreement, in order to have it enforceable by the courts. It is important to contact an experienced family law attorney to draft any contracts between spouses.

As we have previously blogged, Bethenny Frankel, former star of The Real Housewives of New York, and founder of Skinnygirl Cocktails, recently filed for divorce from husband, Jason Hoppy. The parties have a daughter, age 2.

Reportedly, the parties’ separated on December 23, 2012 and Frankel filed for divorce just shortly thereafter (LA Times) It appears from Frankel’s Petition that she is requesting primary physical custody of the parties’ daughter and child support payable by Hoppy, in addition to life insurance, exclusive occupancy of their home and medical, dental, vision and orthodontic care for her and the child. Sources estimate Frankel is worth at least $25 million. This begs the question: Is child support appropriate in cases where the custodial parent is an extraordinarily higher earner?

January is commonly referred to as a “peak season” for divorces in Del Mar and throughout San Diego County. Although many parties file for divorce in January, their timing may be chosen for a variety of different reasons. Filing for divorce during the holiday season can cause tension within the family and significant hardship if children are involved. In an effort to avoid ruining the holidays for the children or the family, some parties put off filing until January.On the other hand, the holiday season can be a very stressful time for families causing the final straw in a marriage to break thus prompting a party to file for divorce. Making a decision to file for divorce is best done with a clear head. The holidays can be a time of chaos and tension and therefore may parties decide to “ride out” the holiday season and then re-evaluate whether they still wish to pursue divorce. In addition to the emotional and psychological reasons for filing for divorce in January, many practical explanations also exist.

As we have previously blogged, the date of separation can have a dramatic impact on the division of property. The timing of filing a divorce petition can be used as the date of separation for the parties depending on the particular facts of the case. If one spouse generally earns a significant year-end bonus or commission, it may be wise to delay filing a petition until after the first of the next year. Once spouses separate, all of their respective earnings and accumulations will remain their separate property. This is quite different than the default rule which states that all earnings and accumulations during marriage are considered community property and divided evenly. Although it is impossible to say how a year-end bonus will certainly be divided at the end of the dissolution process, waiting until after the payment is received to file for divorce may save significant litigation on the issue.

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