Articles Posted in Divorce

By

As we have previously blogged, there are two distinct divorce paths that spouses can take in a San Diego divorce proceeding, the litigation path and the mediation path. As the case goes on, parties may end up using a combination of the two approaches. Part one of this blog explained the litigation process and its many disadvantages such as its high cost and lengthy waiting periods. By contrast, the mediation process is more efficient, less expensive, and less stressful for all parties involved, especially the children.

The Mediation Path If the parties and their attorneys determine that they are able to work cooperatively with the other side and that court intervention is not necessary, they may elect the mediation process outlined below. A mediated divorce typically proceeds as follows:

The parties must first decide if they will retain independent counsel, usually a divorce attorney experienced in advising clients in mediation. In addition, a third party neutral will be selected, regardless of whether the parties have retained counsel or if they will both meet with the neutral unrepresented.

Read questions frequently answered by divorce attorneys

Next, the parties should determine which issues are settled and which issues are disputed. For example, in a Del Mar divorce the parties may realize they agree to divide all of their property equally, but happen to disagree on a reasonable amount of monthly spousal support.

As in the litigation process, the parties must also complete their Declarations of Disclosure including a Schedule of Assets and Debts and an Income and Expense Declaration. However, the parties will not engage in expensive and lengthy discovery because they have decided to cooperate with each other informally.
Once the parties have met with the mediator and agreed on all terms of the settlement, the mediator may draft a martial settlement agreement and file all necessary paperwork with the court.

Learn terms commonly used in a San Diego divorce proceeding

It is evident from the above timeline that a mediated divorce take much less time, effort and money than a litigated proceeding. The better the parties work together to resolve their disputes, the lower the cost of the divorce. There are no “winners” if a divorce case goes to trial because each party will have incurred significant expenses and emotional scars. In mediation, parties have the flexibility to create their own terms and solutions which are mutually beneficial.

www.BickfordLaw.com


Continue reading

By

In San Diego, once parties decide to file for divorce, it is not uncommon for them to be in a rush to just “get it over with”. However, rushing through the divorce process is easier said than done.

One of the most important factors in determining the length of the divorce process is whether the parties and their attorneys decide to take the litigation path, the mediation path, or a combination of both.

The Litigation Path

If the parties and their attorneys determine that they are unable to work cooperatively with the other side and that court intervention is necessary, they must follow the litigation process outlined below. A highly litigated divorce typically proceeds as follows:

Petition
If a Petition has not already been filed, one party must file a Petition and Summons and formally serve these documents on the other side. This process is commonly referred to by San Diego family attorneys as “filing for divorce“. The party who filed the Petition is known as the “Petitioner” and the other party is known as the “Respondent”.

Response
The Respondent must then file a “Response” to the Petition within 30 days of service. Both parties will then begin completing their Preliminary Declarations of Disclosure which includes a Schedule of Assets and Debts and an Income and Expense Declaration. Within these documents, the parties will explain their income and their monthly expenses in addition to identifying all community property assets and obligations.

Motions
Next, the parties can file various motions requesting relief such as temporary child or spousal support, temporary child custody and visitation orders and attorney fees. The timeline for all motions to be heard ranges from an average of 30 days to a year depending on the number of motions, complexity of issues and requests for continuances. If custody and visitation is a disputed issue in the case, the parties must attend Family Court Services mediation or another private mediation.

Discovery
The parties may conduct discovery to find out more information regarding disputed issues. If spousal support is disputed, the parties may investigate issues such as income and assets. If any disputes arise during the discovery process, the parties may file Motions to Compel with the Court to enforce their rights. Should the parties have complex assets or income which is difficult to ascertain, one or both parties may elect to hire experts to weigh in on these issues.

Mandatory Settlement Conference
In San Diego, before the case proceeds to trial, the parties must attend a Mandatory Settlement Conference. This is a meeting between all parties, attorneys, and an independent experienced local family law attorney. If the parties do not reach an agreement, the case may proceed to trial. At trial, both parties present their side of the story with regard to disputed issues. The judge will make a ruling and determine the outcome of all disputed issues.

It is evident from the above timeline that a litigated divorce takes a significant amount of time, money and effort. Even with the assistance of counsel, many divorcing spouses who litigate a large amount of issues call their divorce a “full time job”. In our next blog post, the divorce attorneys at the firm will post about “The Mediation Path”. Stay tuned!

Continue reading

By

Sharing Custody of Children During Religious Holidays

As previously blogged about in “Part I: Religion and Child Custody,” a common issue in divorce revolves around which religion a child will follow after parents separate. Another common issue recognized by divorce attorneys is how to fairly share custody of children during religious holidays. The recent passing of the Easter holiday likely posed a special concern for divorcing parents with children. In our previous post, we discussed parents with sole legal custody.

Read more about custody and divorce in Del MarJoint legal custody presents divorce attorneys with unique issues. If both parents share joint legal custody, and one parent objects to the other parent’s decisions regarding the child’s religion, a judge will have to determine whether the child can be raised as a Catholic, Buddhist, Jewish, etc. The courts will generally first consider the religion that the child was raised in while the parents were still married and order that the child continue to be raised in that same religion.

Since the right to raise a child as the parent sees fit and the right to freedom of religion are both protected by the Constitution, courts must be careful not to infringe on these constitutional rights while still protecting the best interests of the child.

Joint physical custody means that both parents share in the right to spend time with the child or children. Despite custody agreements, problems always seem to arise with regards to holidays, especially when each parent has his/her own religious beliefs and traditions. Holidays like Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are usually easy to compromise, because they have alternative days to give each parent equivalent time. However, the same cannot be said for religious holidays such as Easter. Easter does not have an alternative celebration date. Divorce lawyers must consider their client’s faiths when providing legal advice.

In order to deal with this problem, many divorce attorneys will advise their clients to agree to alternate custody between holidays each year, such as Easter and Thanksgiving. However, for some parents who are particularly religious or have long-lived family traditions, they do not consider the Easter holiday to be equivalent to the Thanksgiving holiday. Thus, shared custody on holidays needs to be determined well ahead of time and with the children’s best interests in mind.

Children With Parents of Different Faiths

Another problem arises where divorcing parents are of differing faiths. For example, where one parent is Christian and the other is Jewish, the Easter and Passover holidays usually pose a concern regarding child custody because the holidays often fall near each other on a calendar. Sometime these two holidays will even occur on the very same day. Therefore, it is extremely important that these situations are discussed early on, and that divorce lawyers draft custody agreements that spell-out exactly what will happen with regards to custody to the greatest extent possible.

www.BickfordLaw.com
Continue reading

By

Which Religion do Children Follow when Parents of Different Faiths Divorce?

With the recent passing of Easter, a Christian holiday, and Pesach (Passover), a Jewish holiday, parents of different faiths may be left wondering which holiday their child will celebrate after a divorce. Because divorcing parents don’t always agree on whose religion the children will follow after divorce, the Court is often left to make a determination as to which religion the children will practice, if any.The Fourteenth Amendment substantive due process clause grants parents a liberty interest in directing their child’s religious upbringing. Therefore, Courts must protect each parent’s Constitutional right to raise the child as that parent sees fit (as long as the welfare of the child is not endangered). However, when parents divorce, the Courts are often left to decide which parent’s constitutional right will prevail in determining the religion of their child. Family law attorneys take a number of factors into consideration when advising clients about their options in regards to their children’s religious upbringing.

Child Decides

Often times the Court will simply allow the child to decide which religion, if any, to follow because it is merely an exercise of the child’s First Amendment right to freedom of religion. Unfortunately for divorce lawyers, no black letter law exists regarding what age a child must be to decide his or her own religion. However, courts generally consider children over 12 to be able to make decisions about their religious preferences.

By allowing the child to determine his/her own religious preference, the courts are not encroaching upon the parents’ Constitutional rights. The parents may continue to practice the religion of their choice, and they have already had the opportunity to exercise their Fourteenth Amendment substantive due process liberty interest to direct their child’s upbringing.

Parent With Sole Legal Custody

When a child is not deemed fit to decide for himself/herself, divorce attorneys note that the court will look to which parent has been awarded legal custody. As discussed in previous blogs, legal custody gives a parent the right to make decisions regarding a child’s health, education, welfare and even religious decisions. If a parent has been awarded sole legal custody of the child, then that parent alone can make all the decisions regarding the child’s religious preference and activities without getting the consent of the other parent or an order from the court.

Parents with Joint Legal Custody

Tomorrow, in “Part II: Religion and Child Custody”, we will discuss the issues presented to divorce attorneys by parents who share joint legal custody of their children. Continue reading

By

Former Philadelphia 76er Allen Iverson’s divorce has been finalized. The resolution came after the second divorce filing by Iverson’s wife, the first having been filed 15 months prior and then withdrawn according to TMZ.

Standing a mere 6 feet (relatively speaking, of course) Iverson was the number one draft pick of the NBA’s Philadelphia 76ers in 1996. He went on to be named NBA Rookie of the Year for the 1996-1997 basketball season. He continued his career with eleven NBA All-Star nods, and won the All-Star MVP award in 2001. Iverson is father to five children.

According to LA Times.com, in the divorce decree the judge awarded Iverson’s wife legal and physical custody of the parties’ five children. In doing so, the court did not have kind words to say about Iverson. According to the article, the court stated about Iverson: “he does not know how to manage the children; has little interest in learning to manage the children and has actually, at times, been a hindrance to their spiritual and emotional growth and development.”

Iverson will have some visitation with his children, provided he complies with certain conditions imposed by the court. Notably, one condition is that he is not allowed to consume any alcohol for the next 18 months, nor consume alcohol within 24 hours of visiting with his children and, logically, during the visits. Reportedly, he is also required to obtain therapy and attend AA for the next year. According to the LA Times article, the divorce decree states that Iverson has “an obvious and serious alcohol problem, which has caused him to do inappropriate things in the presence of the children while impaired”, things such as, the article reports, leaving the children unsupervised.

While Iverson’s divorce is in Atlanta, Georgia, here in San Diego, divorcing parents are similarly faced with issues of alcohol abuse and its implications on custody and visitation issues in the San Diego Superior Court. To address such issues, the California Family Code includes specific provisions.

Prior to making an order for joint physical custody, which means that each of the parents will have significant periods of physical custody, the San Diego family court is required to consider the habitual use of drugs or alcohol by one or both of the parents. Specifically, Family Code §3011 provides: “In making a determination of the best interest of the child in a proceeding…the court shall, among any other factors it finds relevant, consider all of the following: (d) The habitual or continual illegal use of controlled substances or habitual or continual abuse of alcohol by either parent…”

What happens in the case where one parent alleges habitual or continual use of alcohol by the other parent, but the parent facing those allegations denies them? Family Code section 3011 continues: “Before considering these allegations, the court may first require independent corroboration, including, but not limited to written reports from law enforcement agencies, courts, probation departments, social welfare agencies, medical facilities, rehabilitation facilities, or other public agencies or nonprofit organizations providing drug and alcohol abuse services…”

In some cases, there may be a document which can easily corroborate the allegations; in others, it may be a bit more difficult. If it can otherwise be shown by a preponderance of the evidence that there is habitual or continual abuse of alcohol by a parent, a judge may order that parent to undergo testing for the use of alcohol. If such testing is ordered, it must be done by the least intrusive means. Further, the parent against whom the allegations are made (and thus who is ordered to submit to the test) has a right to a hearing to challenge the results. A positive test cannot alone be the determinative factor in a custody and visitation ruling; the court is still required to balance all factors to determine the best interests of the children.
Continue reading

By

www.dailymail.co.uk recently published an article with the headline “Divorce after a child turns seven makes them more likely to perform badly at school.” The article cites a study conducted by the Childhood Wellbeing Research Centre that was published by the Department for Education. The government-funded study found that children whose parents divorced after the child had turned seven are more likely to perform poorly and have behavioral problems. The article opined that the lesser impact on children under the age of seven is likely because divorce may have a lesser effect on younger children as they cannot fully understand the implications.Divorce was one of the 40 factors looked at by the study for its effects on a child’s scholastic achievement and behavior. Among the other factors looked at were number of siblings, number of hours spent in front of the television, the way in which rules are enforced in a household, grandparent involvement and general parenting skills, to name a few. The study projected that the effects on children at the age of seven are likely to continue into the child’s teen years and adulthood. The study highlighted the importance of family separation, conflict and divorce on the development of children.

Of course, divorce is in some cases unavoidable. In those cases where divorce must occur, what can San Diego parents do to minimize the conflict and the effect on their children?

One tool parents can utilize is a well thought out parenting plan. When an issue of custody and visitation is brought before the court in San Diego, the parents are required to participate in custody mediation. They can do so either at Family Court Services, which is a free program run by the San Diego Superior Court, or they can opt for private mediation at their own expense. The stated purpose of this custody mediation is to reduce the conflict which may exist between the parties and to develop a custody and time-sharing agreement which is in the best interests of the children. It is not uncommon, however, that San Diego parents are unable to reach an agreement through mediation. In that case, the mediator issues a report and recommendation which is then considered by the court in making its ruling of the custody and/or visitation issue. Frequently, in these recommendations we as divorce attorneys see language included in the proposed parenting plan that is geared towards reducing conflict between the parents. Some such provisions which immediately come to mind are:

“Neither parent shall make negative statements about the other in the presence of or hearing of the children or question the children about the other parent.”

“The parents shall communicate directly with each other in matters concerning the children and shall not use the children as a messenger between them.”

“The children shall not be exposed to court papers or disputes between the parents, and each parent shall make every possible effort to ensure that other people comply with this order.”

Such language may be included in a parenting plan at the recommendation of the mediator, but can also simply be included by agreement between the parties.

Another tool for parents is the resource Kids Turn. Kids’ Turn is a San Diego non-profit organization dedicated to working with the entire family to achieve an amicable and healthy divorce.

Read more about Kids’ Turn or visit their website.

The study published by the Department of Education did qualify its results by stating that “Some children do relatively well despite unpromising circumstances and some do relatively poor despite having a good start.” It’s nonetheless helpful for San Diego parents to be aware of how a divorce might impact their children and to take steps that may be appropriate to mitigate any negative impact there may be.
Continue reading

By

Brendan Fraser and Afton Smith married in 1998 and divorced nine years later in 2007. At the time of their divorce, Fraser was ordered to pay Smith approximately $900,000 per year for spousal support and child support for their three children. Now, Fraser claims that he can no longer make the required payments, which, if made on a monthly basis, total $75,000 per month. Fraser has filed a motion in family court seeking a post-judgment modification of child and spousal support.

In San Diego, after a divorce is finalized, family courts generally have the ability to change support orders if facts and circumstances have materially changed since the first orders were made. If the moving party can prove to the court a “material change of circumstances” he or she may be granted a post-judgment modification of support. One of the most common changes of circumstance relied upon by courts is a change in income for one or both parties. If the spouse ordered to pay support has experienced a significant decrease in earnings, the court may lower his or her support obligation.

However, it is important to note that San Diego family courts only have the ability to modify the support order back to the date a motion was filed. If one spouse gets fired and does not file a motion to modify support for a few months, he or she may owe a significant amount of back child and/or spousal support. Regardless of a spouse’s current income, his or her obligation to pay support will not change until a motion is filed with the court. Even in cases where a judge determines that a material change of circumstances exists and that support should be modified going forward, he or she is not required by law to make the order retroactive to the date the motion was filed.

Continue reading

By

For many Del Mar families, real estate is their most valuable asset. Because the prices of the average family home are so high, many families must invest significant funds into real estate just to live in the area.

However, upon divorce, all community property must be divided equally by the court.

If the parties have no other assets as valuable as the family home, it must be sold and the proceeds divided.

Continue reading

By

In July 2012, Us Weekly released photos of Twilight star, Kristen Stewart, and Snow White and the Huntsman director, Rupert Sanders’, cheating scandal. Stewart and Sanders were photographed kissing in a parked car on the side of a secluded road. At the time, Stewart was involved in a serious relationship with teen heartthrob Robert Pattinson, and Sanders was married to British model Liberty Ross. Although Stewart and Pattinson reconciled in September, Ross has recently filed for divorce from her husband of nine years.Ross and Sanders reportedly gave their marriage another shot after news of the cheating scandal broke and even attended marriage counseling. However, Ross was unable to move past her husband’s public infidelity. The former couple has two children, Skyla, age 7, and Tennyson, age 5. In her Petition for Dissolution of Marriage, Ross requested joint custody of the children in addition to spousal support and attorney fees. Sanders filed a Response to the Petition also requesting joint custody but not spousal support. Sanders wants each party to bear the cost of his or her own attorney fees.

Learn more about the divorce process in Del Mar

Ross retained celebrity divorce attorney, Laura Wasser, to represent her in her divorce. Wasser is most famous for her representation of celebrities such as Heidi Klum, Ryan Reynolds, Kim Kardashian, and Britney Spears. According to Los Angeles Times, Wasser’s services will cost Ross $750 per hour. With rates that high, it’s no surprise that she is asking the court to order Sanders to cover Wasser’s fees. As Del Mar divorce attorneys are well aware, California courts have the authority to order one spouse to contribute toward the attorney fees and costs incurred by the other spouse. However, since California is a “no-fault” state, Sanders’ infidelity will be irrelevant to all of the court’s rulings.

Continue reading

By

Valentine’s Day is a romantic time in Del Mar and throughout San Diego County. The romance of this holiday can sometimes stir up old feelings between divorcing spouses. It is not uncommon for spouses going through a Del Mar divorce to send each other gifts on Valentine’s Day or even to spend the day together. However, it is important to consider the legal ramifications of these acts especially with regard to the date of separation. On the other hand, newly separated spouses may be spending Valentine’s Day with a new significant other for the first time in a while. Before substantial gifts are given to a new love interest or money is spent on a lavish trip, it is important to also consider how these acts may impact your divorce proceeding in Del Mar.

The date of separation is an important consideration in many divorces. The marital estate is the property divided upon divorce. Property can only be accumulated in the martial estate between the date of marriage and the date of separation. Thus, once spouses decide to end their marriage, they stop accumulating any community assets. In order for a separation to occur, the spouses must physically separate (live apart) with the simultaneous intent never to resume the marital relationship. As Del Mar divorce attorneys understand, only one spouse is necessary to establish the requisite intent to end the marriage.

Read more about date of separation from Del Mar divorce lawyer Nancy Bickford

Continue reading
Contact Information
Del Mar Technology Center
12348 High Bluff Dr, #220
San Diego, CA 92130
Phone: 858-793-8884
Fax: 858-793-8874

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.

Please do not include any confidential or sensitive information in a contact form, text message, or voicemail. The contact form sends information by non-encrypted email, which is not secure. Submitting a contact form, sending a text message, making a phone call, or leaving a voicemail does not create an attorney-client relationship.

Copyright © 2025, Bickford Blado & Botros
JUSTIA Law Firm Blog Design