4 Things You Should Never Do During Divorce

Divorce is never easy, even when spouses are relatively agreeable with one another and reach the mutual decision to end their marriage. There is almost always some emotional discontent in divorce proceedings, and it can be challenging for some spouses to make calculated practical decisions concerning their divorce. Unfortunately, the emotional stress of the divorce process causes some divorcing spouses to lose sight of their best interests. Many people in this position make critical errors that negatively impact their divorce proceedings and their futures beyond divorce.

If you are getting ready for divorce proceedings in California, it’s not only necessary to know the value of legal representation but also to have some idea of how to effectively handle the process. You must also know what not to do and understand the potential consequences of mistakes commonly made in the divorce process.

1. Don’t Post About Your Divorce Online

   One of the biggest mistakes you can make during your divorce is talking about it publicly before it is concluded, including social media. Anything you post online is publicly available information and could work against you. As a general rule, it is best to avoid posting on social media during any legal case. While it’s typically fine to passively read your social media feeds, you should avoid interacting with other people’s posts or posting anything of your own. Even if you think your post is entirely unrelated to your divorce, you may be surprised to later discover that your spouse has somehow used the post against you in divorce proceedings.

   Most attorneys handling all cases will recommend that their clients avoid social media until their cases conclude. This may seem overly cautious, but the reality is that many people have complicated their divorce proceedings in numerous ways due to their social media posts. If your testimony about any aspect of your divorce conflicts with things you have posted online, you can expect these discrepancies to negatively influence the outcome of your divorce.

2. Don’t Act Out of Spite

   Many divorce cases arise due to significant personal issues between the spouses. If your spouse did something to directly cause the breakdown of your marriage, it is very easy to want to “teach them a lesson” during your divorce. Unfortunately, it’s also possible for a divorce to begin relatively amicably and then quickly deteriorate as the spouses’ views of one another change. While you may have extremely negative feelings toward your soon-to-be ex-spouse, you should not allow the emotional side of your divorce to compel you to make rash or spiteful decisions that ultimately hurt you as much as they hurt your spouse.

   It can be difficult to stay objective about your needs and concerns when you are divorcing, especially if a tense emotional undercurrent is prevalent in your divorce proceedings. This is a situation where it is crucial to have legal counsel you can trust. The right attorney can not only help you manage the procedural requirements of your case, but they can also offer valuable guidance and support that helps you maintain a practical perspective of the situation. Acting out of spite in divorce rarely works out in your favor. No matter how hard it may be, it’s best to try to keep yourself as emotionally neutral about the situation as possible.

3. Don’t Use Your Kids Against Your Spouse

   If you are divorcing and have children with your spouse, your divorce is likely to be much harder on your kids than it is on you. Unfortunately, many divorcing parents lose sight of this and essentially weaponize their children against the other parent and engage in underhanded tactics to win custody. It’s vital for divorcing parents to separate their shared responsibilities as parents from their concerns regarding divorce. If you try to turn your children against your spouse, this does nothing to help your children through a difficult time. Depending on how you go about it, your behavior could ultimately cause extreme damage to your relationships with your kids.

   Ideally, divorcing parents should work together to help their children understand what is happening to their family. Parents should reassure their children that they still love them and want what’s best for them, but they need to adjust their family dynamics. Being open and constructive with your kids during divorce is always best. If you and your spouse can collaborate on this, then both of you can maintain better relationships with your kids after divorce.

4. Don’t Try to Handle Your Divorce Alone

   While it may be technically possible to navigate a divorce case without legal representation, doing so is incredibly risky and challenging. Hiring an experienced divorce attorney is one of the best decisions you can make when it comes to handling your dissolution proceedings effectively. If you try to handle your divorce without legal representation, you face several significant risks. First, you could make mistakes in your court filings that lead to substantial delays in the court’s handling of your divorce. You could also overlook crucial details pertaining to property division, resulting in an imbalanced division of assets and debts that causes long-term economic strain. You may also struggle to formulate an effective negotiating position, resulting in a less favorable divorce order than you would like.

Ultimately, legal representation from an experienced California divorce lawyer is the best asset to have on your side in a complex divorce case. No matter what your divorce entails, you can rely on your legal team to help you manage your procedural obligations and approach the process with confidence. They can help you determine whether alternative dispute resolution would be effective in your situation, potentially saving you a tremendous amount of time and money on your divorce. If you must proceed to litigation, you can rely on your attorney to prepare you for every court session and present a compelling case on your behalf.

Bickford, Blado & Botros has extensive experience representing clients in complex divorce cases throughout California. We understand that it is usually challenging to handle the emotional aspects of divorce and your practical concerns simultaneously. Our goal is to provide detailed guidance and legal support through every aspect of your case, ultimately helping you reach the best possible outcome in your divorce. If you’re ready to discuss legal representation for your divorce with an experienced and trustworthy divorce attorney, contact us today to schedule a consultation with our team.

 

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